The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare (2024)
The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare is about a clandestine effort to cripple Germany’s U-boat campaign early in the Second World War, paving the way for special forces ops. Its source material comes from a file of Winston Churchill’s that was only declassified in 2016. Is the movie fun? Heck, yeah. Is it historically accurate? Heck, no.
It’s 1941, and Britain is struggling to keep itself above water in the midst of Germany’s attempts to conquer it, and it doesn’t help that their ships, both military and civilian, are at the mercy of German U-boats. Instead of picking off the U-boats one by one, though, Winston Churchill and a few other far-seeing British officers get the idea of cutting them off at the source, but in order to do it, they need to act in the utmost secrecy.
Enter Gus March-Phillips, a commando who’s been in prison, and although what he did isn’t exactly clear, he does have sticky fingers. His mission is to blow up an Italian ship called the Duchessa, which is thought to be supplying the U-boats. Gus says yes on the condition that he’s allowed to assemble his own team, who are all rogues like himself.
Be careful, Gus is warned. If he and his team are caught by the Brits, they will go to prison and face a military tribunal. If the Nazis catch them, they will be tortured and killed. Gus accepts, of course, because what choice does he have? What follows is a tour-de-force of derring-do and quick thinking that will change the European war and enable the Allies to win out over the Axis.
Gus is brought to life wonderfully by Henry Cavill, who’s been having quite the busy 2024. Apparently Argylle was but a pit stop for our Mr. Cavill, as Ministry is a vastly superior movie, and he plays Ministry’s Gus with a mixture of steely-eyed determination and sly fun. His cohorts bring more of the same, but each in their own way, playing types, although it’s more about them functioning as a team than about their individuality. Each one of them are ruthless killers who always have surprises up their sleeves. Or concealed in their nylons, as the case may be.
The Nazis in this movie are cartoonishly menacing. Til Schweiger as Heinrich Luhr in particular wears an exaggerated sneer most of the time, which only really gets wiped off when team member Marjorie gives him something he’s not expecting, and it’s safe to say he’ll never recover.
In sharpest contrast is Cary Elwes as Brigadeer Gubbins, who seems to wear a single bemused expression and understated line delivery. He’s so calm that he’s almost boring, to be honest, especially when we know what he’s done in the past (ahem, Westley). Brits do have emotions, Mr. Elwes. It’s OK.
Meanwhile, an almost unrecognizable Rory Kinnear is a dead-on Winston Churchill, not so much in looks but in voice—he’s got Churchill’s slight growl down pat.
In case it isn’t clear by now, The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare isn’t so much a presentation of true events as a parody of true events, and it would be insulting if it wasn’t so danged enjoyable. In one scene, for instance, the Ministry is told over the radio to abort their mission and Gus feigns bad reception as if he’s talking on a cell phone going through a tunnel.
Yeah, the inaccuracies in the film are glaringly obvious, the biggest being the insertion of fictional black characters Heron and Kalu into the Ministry and giving them big parts to play in Operation Postmaster. Heinrich even has a black valet, and there’s a black steward on one of the trains.
While there’s nothing wrong with these characters in the slightest, their participation in the film is completely implausible, as the Nazis were notorious for treating black people as subhuman. If there was so much riding on Operation Postmaster, why would they use people who would have been immediately singled out by the Nazis? And why would Heinrich have a black valet? Black people in Germany were excluded from employment to the point that many were forced to take up entertainment jobs just to survive. Like the Jews, there were black people who were sent to concentration camps, prisons, and forced into slave labor. While some left records of their experiences behind, we still don’t know the full extent of the Nazis’ treatment of black people in Europe.
Not only that, but the way the film treats black characters in the end is a bit shoddy, as we see photos of every real-life member of the group but the black characters, which only confirms that they were fake. It’s as if the movie builds up these characters, only to chortle out, “Psych!” at the last minute. Tacky.
Speaking of chortling, I had to chuckle when one of the characters said that infamous line from Casablanca, “I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.” Funny that a Brit in 1941 is able to quote a movie that wasn’t released in Britain until 1943.
Another thing that the film misses is that Operation Postmaster wasn’t exactly a secret before 2016. In 2005 Marcus Binney published Secret War Heroes, a history of Churchill’s special ops forces, including March-Phillips, sourced from agents’ personal files. It’s pretty safe to say a whole series of movies could be made just from the stories Binney unearthed.
Other than that, The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare is what espionage movies should be and deserves repeated viewings because it’s entertaining, fast, and well-written. Everyone involved, despite some liberties taken, did themselves proud.
The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare is currently in theaters. Rated R.
My grade: B+
Principal Cast: Henry Cavill, Alan Ritchson, Alex Pettyfer, Eiza Gonzalez, Babs Olusanmokun, Cary Elwes, Hero Fiennes Tiffin, Henry Golding, Rory Kinnear, Til Schweiger, Freddie Fox, James Wilby, Henrique Zaga, Danny Sapani, Matthew Hawksley, Simon Paisley-Day, Mark Oosterveen, Victor Oshin
Directed by Guy Ritchie.
Written by Patrick Tamasy, Eric Johnson, and Arash Amel.