Sidelined: The QB and Me (2024)
Remember when James Van Der Beek played a star quarterback in Varsity Blues? Now he plays the football dad of a star quarterback in Sidelined: The QB and Me. What would Mox think, and for that matter, would Van Der Beek’s former Dawson’s Creek self call it “a thin and pedestrian sports film?”
Well, yes and no.
Drayton Lahey is all set to go to Waco on a football scholarship. We’re supposed to assume this means Waco, Texas, but the only university in Waco is Baylor University, and no one ever mentions that. Yes, Sidelined is Just A Movie, but couldn’t they have picked Texas A&M or something?
Anywhoo, this school Dray’s supposed to go to has been attended by his dad, his grandpa, and pretty much every male in his family. Drayton has a legacy to continue and needs to keep his head in the game.
Er. High School Musical and Varsity Blues both called. They want their overdone storyline back.
Meanwhile, Dallas Bryan has her heart set on a dance scholarship to CalArts, but her teacher says she overthinks everything and needs to feel her routines. Dallas is so focused, though. She doesn’t go to parties. She doesn’t date. She hangs out with her friend, Gabby, eats fried rice with her brother, and is on the cheer squad, but that’s about it.
So what’s a CalArts hopeful to do? Why, get together with the star quarterback, of course. It’s a bad idea because they might be going to different schools after graduation, but dangit, Drayton is so cute.
In case it isn’t super obvious by now, Sidelines is extremely lightweight. It’s predictable, because football movies always are (Except for Brian’s Song, of course). It feels like a gyp. Everyone has been touting James Van Der Beek starring opposite a promising newcomer and imparting wisdom and cred, but the former Mox is sadly underutilized and only onscreen for about ten minutes at the most. There’s barely any interplay between Drayton and his dad, who we know in passing to be named Leroy. We’re just supposed to accept that these guys have a contentious relationship.
Leroy Lahey. Say that name five times fast. Apologies to any Leroy Laheys who may read this. Anywhoo…
Technically the movie also looks a bit sloppy. There’s this weird focus problem where two people can be sitting next to each other in frame, but one will be fuzzy and the other won’t be, even though they’re a few inches apart. The whole movie looks like this. I kept wishing for just a minute or two of Gregg Toland’s famous deep focus, although it probably would have been wasted on a movie like this.
Flaws aside, Sidelines is strangely entertaining. Again, there’s really no way to wring tension out of a football movie (Will the quarterback complete the winning pass?), but the music is decent, there are some cute parts, and according to my son, who saw the film with me, some of the dialogue is realistic to high schoolers, although he thought the acting was pretty shoddy.
This isn’t shocking, as Sidelines is definitely a bit amateurish. Noah Beck, who plays Drayton, is a TikTok star, and the movie’s source material comes from a Wattpad story of the same title. I haven’t read anything on Wattpad, which is a fanfic and romance self-publishing site not entirely unlike Substack, but seeing as other movies that have been made from Wattpad stories scream “cheap drama,” it’s a safe bet that the quality is variable. However, kudos to the filmmakers for mining alternative sources for subject matter.
Would Dawson Leery get into Sidelines? Probably not. Mox would likely give it a pass as well. The rest of us of us, on the other hand, might go for it if only to spend a few minutes with a familiar face.
Sidelines: The QB and Me is currently streaming on Netflix. Not rated.
My grade: C-
Principal Cast: Siena Agudong, Noah Beck, Drew Ray Tanner, James Van Der Beek, Deborah Cox, Asia Lizardo, Jake Foy, Kendall Cross, Jason Fernandes, Josh Zaharia, Mia Shanks, Samantha Montgomery-Swan, Chris Wood, Peter Kelamis, Leanne Allen, Jia Curtis, Austyn Lamont, Lola Clare
Directed by Justin Wu.
Written by Crystal Ferreiro and Mary Gulino.